I have been working on living more in the moment. Being more present. Learning to appreciate all the wonderful people and events in my life. But I haven't been exactly knocking it out of the park lately.
Due to a lack of commitment I have strayed from the things I "planned" on doing when I started down a more mindful path a few months ago. Daily meditations quickly became bi weekly after the initial benefits were felt. Telling any who would listen about my new found zen. But in a matter of weeks, I found myself back where I started. Angry, unappreciative, over reactive and I'll be damned if I could remember how many weeks it had been since I had meditated or practiced being grateful.
Sound like a familiar pattern? We join a gym, see the results after six weeks of work and begin to slag off, having reached the beginning of the beginning of our goal we take part in sharing our new found gains with any and all. But quickly fall out of the actual habit, this happens with A LOT of things, I'm pretty sure to A LOT of people: eating healthy, quitting smoking, quitting drinking, drugs, etc, etc. We seem to make our lives these laps of this pattern through various activities and substances.
Last week the universe brought me a guy named Frank. He was one of three older guys I got paired with playing golf. After a few holes it was clear Frank couldn't quite see or hear very well.
Not unusual for a group of older golfers. But it came up on about the fourth or fifth hole that he couldn't see well and he took his glasses off and showed me he was missing an eye. He was hit square in the eye with a drive from about 60 feet away. The guy that hit him took off, was sued and has disappeared.
Did I mention I met him golfing? I was so upset for him, about the guy that took off, all his medical bills, trauma, etc. We were making the turn and he said, "you know Pete, I was in Vietnam as an infantryman, I wasn't supposed to be at that golf course that day, in that group or on that cart, when stuffs gonna happen its gonna happen, so just enjoy it while you can."
And just like that I was thrust into some f'ng gratitude for the first time in a few weeks and shot two over on the back. Imagine that.
So, short of running into Frank, do yourself a favor and have an honest check in with yourself about what things you're planning and what things you're actually doing.
You're planning on taking a trip to Thailand, planning on coaching your kids team, planning on being more patient, planning on taking your wife to that place, planning on going kayaking in New Zealand, planning on being more humble, planning on learning to surf, planning to be nicer, planning on taking that trip to Hawaii, planning on working out, planning on eating better, what, if any are you doing?